Do I want help if I need help? If not, then it makes sense to remain blissfully unaware of the need by never really looking to see if help is needed. Those that want to improve daily lean into the the built-in self-defense systems that like to say “nothing to see here!”. Don’t Jedi mind trick yourself
Do I have a deep wound inside that I avert my eyes from? Pain is aversive, so it can be tempting to tell myself that no improvement is necessary because this version of myself is who I am and people need to accept it. Improvement requires dealing with pain. It means addressing the wounds so that they
Opening ourselves up to an incomplete perspective exposes us and can be scary and uncomfortable. It is bearable when done with the right person. There are people we are friendly with and there are friends that might as well be family. Unfortunately, the lines have been blurred and definitions of friendship diluted by Facebook’s friend request system.
Yes. People don’t disagree well and therefore, people watch those they disagree with closely. Eventually, we make them an enemy in our mind because they stand for something we are against. I have come to realize that valuable information can be gained from what those that resent me think of me. Someone that watches me closely for
It’s easier to ask someone who likes me to give me insight into how I can be better as a person. Is it wise to consider what an enemy would say? Do people have enemies? Yes, unfortunately. In today’s culture that demands tolerance, we see an increase in the polarization of society.
Once we accept that no one, including ourselves, have a complete perspective on who we are, we can accept the fact that the truth about us is found in the overlap of perspectives made possible by a life-giving relationship. We are only able to reach our potential by gaining the insight that others have. Our true self
No one outside of ourselves has the complete context that makes us who we are today, but our own perspective blinds us from seeing what everyone else experiences. So how do we grow? Beneficial growth doesn’t happen by accident. Our biases like to tell us that everything will be good enough. This is especially true about ourselves.
Intentional systems of communication and feedback need to not only be implemented, they have to be seen by the team culture as vital or they will feel like homework. If the leader wants to improve but the teams is content with the status quo, reporting will feel like busy work. Teams that are committed to improve and
No news isn’t always good news because perhaps I just don’t have a system to intentionally receive news. When we want nothing to be wrong, we believe that the lack of obvious dysfunction confirms that desired belief. A leader that truly desires to improve the team needs to actively look for areas of improvement that are found
When we let someone off the hook, we allow the team to abide mistakes when they shouldn’t in order to preserve a pleasant and positive atmosphere. This only lasts so long because when mistakes become the norm, the team will eventually become embarrassed and nothing overcomes sentimental protection of feelings like embarrassment. The concern for feelings usually