Category Archives: Emotional Security

Managing Anger

Anger seems to be an emotion that many people fear, and for good reason. Unmanaged anger can result in outbursts that can bring both physical and emotional harm. I believe most people are not taught how to manage their anger because they mistakenly correlate the result of unmanaged anger with the actual emotion. Anger can be managed

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Impulse Control

Our emotions are real and they control our ability to decide to act. Put another way, when we care about something, we act. If we care too much or lose control of how we express our concern, we will act impulsively and that rarely has a positive effect except to communicate that we are not thinking. Our

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What Emotional Security Looks Like

I have been thinking and writing a lot about emotional security and insecurity. It’s important to understand what they both look like. We all have insecure moments and we hopefully have emotionally secure moments. What is the difference? I am insecure when my motives focus on preserving my image more than doing the next best thing. Reputation

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The Power of Empathy

Just like insecurity gets in the way of our ability to truly empathize and have compassion on others, it also blocks our ability to connect with our teammates in a deeper way. It’s difficult to get “close” to an insecure person because they work so hard to keep up appearances. Those appearances are not often honest enough

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Irrational

Some people respond to the reality of emotions by wishing them away. They don’t see passion or anger as useful so they attempt to maintain a stoic posture towards the circumstances of life. Many believe that we are most rational when we remove all emotions, as if this is a more clinical way to view the world.

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Assessing the Heart

Being a great teammate requires self-awareness that highlights opportunities to improve. Our emotions can cloud our self-awareness like a fog. Anger makes us feel more right than we really are. Sadness can bring an enhanced feeling of helplessness. Joy can color things in a way that makes everything seem awesome. All of these emotions are real even

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Needing Certainty, Being Flexible

Emotional security is something I write about a lot because it’s something that I have identified as a crucial aspect of great teammates. Insecurity is such a liability to a team for so many reasons. One of the reasons Covid-19 highlighted for me is our need for certainty when we feel insecure. Flexibility requires an emotional strength

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The Snowball of Insecure Ignorance

Leaders must trust those who have an expertise in an area that extends beyond their own understanding. This is a benefit to both the leader and the team. It’s easier said than done because in the Information Age we live in, we like to consider ourselves experts thanks to the tidbits we pick up on our social

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Tortured

How tortured it must feel to perpetually want something but not be willing to attempt the acquisition of it. When we allow fear and doubt to cloud our perception of our own ability, we begin to live in an alternate reality where we see life through the unfortunate lens of misplaced passions and dreams that are just

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Can I?

It is true that we only do what we care about but that is also limited by our ability to accomplish what we care about. Wanting and caring are one thing but being able to pull it off is entirely another. I believe this is where much of the angst of our lives is generated from because

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