Whether in a sport, at a job, or in a family, everyone everywhere is part of a team. The Everyday Drills blog is designed to create a moment each morning where we are intentional about becoming better teammates and team leaders. Subscribe for thoughtful ways for you and your team to be challenged each and every day.
Great teammates respect their other teammates. This is especially true for a great team that is stacked with talent and experience. Some people have never really had the experience of respect so they cannot give it. They mistake their envy of another teammate for respect. How can I know the difference? When I admire another teammate I am inspired to be better. When I envy another teammate I resent the fact that they are better than me and have no real admiration for them. Resentment and the lack of personal inspiration is a clear sign of disrespect.
Passion is never an excuse for an emotional outburst. Anger is a great motivator and sometimes it’s too great. When it’s used to intimidate and influence an argument, it’s wrong. People who have mastered anger management can appear perfectly calm but still be seething inside. This is not fake. This is meek. There is a difference. Fake would be saying you’re not angry when you are. Meek is answering the question of anger with a calm and cold demeanor. Now that may not be believed, but when it is, it may be a bit more influential than an outburst and therefore appropriate. Outbursts of anger are wrong… not anger itself.
Anger that is bottled up and well controlled has a healthy resolution. Bitterness can feel like managed anger because it usually is, but it doesn’t really end well…nor does it want to. Well controlled anger sees an end of the tunnel. Bitterness is a form of quiet anger that flares up when it gets an opportunity. Well managed anger is healthy and motivating toward a desired outcome. Bitterness is an unhealthy anger that is always looking to perpetuate itself on the target of anger without desiring a resolution. The little green guy got it wrong…anger doesn’t lead to hate. Bitterness resulting from an unresolved conflict does. You’re angry when you want to make something right. You’re bitter when you decide you want to stay angry as a form of punishment for the person or event that is the source of your anger.