Fear is not love.
People hesitate because they are afraid but sometimes they tell a different story to themselves afterward to justify their lack of action. When we attach our fear to emotional pain we can easily justify our fearful response as being loving or caring. In an effort to communicate care, we begin statements describing how we feel with the words, “I am afraid that…” Who would want to get hurt or who would knowingly want to hurt someone else? It’s easy to mistake our fear for love when we see it preserving the feelings of others. The problem with this line of thinking is that our fear almost always presents a future that isn’t true. Love is demonstrated in doing the hard thing no matter what. Love is not found in doing the easy things that keep the peace. Peace-keeping teams are teams that limit themselves because the peace they keep costs them the depth of relationships that make a great team great.